Living within the darkness,
A place the heavens might like
I hope I never see another spec of light,
And if the truth never reaches the surface,
Remember that you got a glimpse of my soul
Even covered in black,
You saw a piece of gold.
And if you never felt my apathy,
Believe that I still cut the wrist of my friends,
Listening O’jays, drinking oj’s,
till the end
And if you can’t recall my loyalty,
there is war within me
and casualties are recommended.
To be forgiveful is a crime
Spare neither the weak nor the strong
Make allies with the dumb till they’re done
Burn ashes and create rivers…
Let thy will be blood
But remember you are not god
So make it last eternity,
observing skins withering back to dust
From mid-year 2014, I got caressed by the thought of spoken words, and wanted to try it. My first thought was well to go to someone from LabWorX and ask them to do it, and i did. I choose that route because, well I just wasnt interested in doing it myself and I have serious performance freight sometimes. Oh and my voice is hideous, let’s not forget that. But on that note, I found not all of them could be done by any other but myself due to my writings being even more personal than before, and they just never matched with any other voice perfectly, in my head. This means it’s up to me alone to execute it, poor me. I am open to suggestions on not criticism…. i can guarantee no one is harder on me than me. Here is my first recording, i think i did it to instruments but I’m not sure;
Writing like me… life depend pon it
me cyah go back to being broke again
‘Cause everything legit
A the first time me see a light bill,
Smile…. and deal wid it
A Stephen this,
me cant believe this shit
A really Stephen dis
Buying the finer things in life
(Black) mannequin designs
Keeping ahead of times,
Like me ave a booth traveling like that guy,
Who… really ago pree me fi working overtime
Been missing for months i swear
Jus up inna me cave
Doing rituals n’ pray
Him show me the way
Fi be everything to everyone I care fa inna life
To keep u secure, thats why i write
The other day I was having a conversation with a dear friend of mines and those who know me well enough knows that I’ll be goofing off at some point, despite the seriousness of the topic. Just the set the mood I extracted a piece of it,
Her: DWL, Good ol stephen, there is not a change for u
Me: Neva mess wit perfection lol
Her: U claim perfection?
Me: Yes how cud i not
Me: I wud neva question god
That’s me defending my personality and physique. Now, that precise moment it was all fun and games, I went into deep thought, well not soo deep, more like one of my sleepless nights. Nonetheless, I was right based off the logics of religions well the ones I know little about, like Christianity, the rastafari movement and Islam, thanks to school, friends, the saviour of a generation and beyond (aka the internet) and those extremely annoying persons who try to force their religious belief unto others (you know yourself 👿 ). Recouping some of the information I had, I went in search for couple of the sources and found these;
Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are. Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seemeth to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise. 1 Corinthians 3:16-17
4:119 And surely I will lead them astray, and surely I will arouse desires in them, and surely I will command them and they will cut the cattle’s ears, andsurely I will command them and they will change Allah’s creation. Whoso chooseth Satan for a patron instead of Allah is verily a loser and his loss is manifest. (From the QURAN, I hope)
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. Genesis 1:27
I usually remember the last verse after saying stuff like I’m perfect. Now, in Jamaica, the predominant religion is Christianity, even though a large quantity of the population may not be baptize, or be practicing christians, unless under extreme situations or sometimes petty disagreements, they are never hesitant to call upon God’s name, pleading for help or express how god bless they are, etc (sometimes I find it assuming). With that said it’s safe to say we acknowledge god is real…. cool? Now on to pressing matters.
I imagine Judgement Day to be something like this…. I’m in Jamaican line, or my age group line, whichever it is, waiting for my turn. I’m next in line by the way. In front of me is a bleacher or plastic surgery patient, or a Paris Hilton persona, and God, just for dramatic theatrics, opens his enormous book skips a few pages, then shuts it back and peers at whoever over his reading glasses and ask… WHY?
After that our minds should be fucked in every way trying to find a answer. Is this not a way of us questioning God’s greatness? Messing with his masterpiece? I should just walk off into hell, can I move? What will happen if i move? Oh shit, he knows what I’m thinking, I’m fucked!!!
Umm yes. I hope though someone would be brave or dumb enough to give a reply like “you made me do it. You’re the one in control.”, That would be ingenius, well to me it would be. The mere fact they replied, priceless. I also hope its the right person too, I’m reffering to those who justify their wrong doings with comparisons to others…. me neva kill nobody, I never rob or tief, me neva fuck no batty…. And somewhere the devil be singing another one bites the dust
He that is without sin, let him cast the first stone (getting all biblical up in here, I feel mommy proudness), in other words, are you really going to take on God’s job? Infront of him? Please don’t take any of this writing as me taking a stance against anything I spoke about, I really don’t care what people do behind close doors… ask me first
I once told Maryam hell’s gonna be overcrowded, for all I know, I might even end up there for my sacrilegious actions, or my tat, or my other demons, who knows.
But until then I will be continue be curious on what that day be like…
Somewhere along the path you found me
I don’t know where, when,
Definitely not how.
But I wish I did.
I would tell the world when you saved my life
On that day, that hour, that minute you arrived;
All i know is i was no longer in hell
everything switched up
I had no more blinds
Coverin my eyes
You showed me what’s right from what’s rights
And what’s beauty beyond time.
Made a mirror for me to see who am I
And I hated you,
I hated it,
But really, I hated me
What would have become of me
A lifestyle of consequences
If you haven’t found me
The real me